You're absolutely right, Jesus never said that. I've never met a Christian who would ever make such a claim. I have, however, met many Christians, both man and woman, who almost certainly believe this. Why you ask? Because of a few verses that warn against causing your brother to stumble. The two most famous instances of this idea are Luke 17:1-3 and 1 Corinthians 8:1-13. There are others, and they all basically say the same thing, it's just that these are the two you'll here the most. Go ahead and read that. I'll wait.
Oh, you're done already? Sorry. I was just um... winning... at life....
Of course, Jesus never would have said it if he didn't mean it. Jesus made it a habit to not say things he didn't mean. Unfortunately, there's a lot of well meaning (I hope) people who like to take Jesus' words, in this case, "It
would be better for them to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied
around their neck than to cause one of these little ones to
stumble." (Luke 17:2), out of context and twist it to mean "Don't do anything because you might make someone sin", which is in direct contradiction to... well... the entire rest of the Bible.
So, what did Jesus mean, exactly? Let's look at this in it's context, both within context of the surrounding text and the context of the Bible as a whole.
Go read Luke 17:1-3. No where in that passage does Jesus say, "You, who caused your brother to stumble, will be held accountable for your brother's sinful actions." He says, "It
would be better for them to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied
around their neck than to cause one of these little ones to
stumble." Simply reading the text will tell you that Jesus never said that you would be held responsible for the actions of others, just that you shouldn't take causing someone to stumble lightly. If you, by chance, happen to do something that will cause someone to stumble, you should be mindful of such things, and you should never knowingly cause your brother to stumble. No where in this passage, or any other passage like it, does it say that you will held accountable for the actions of a brother because of this.
Because
the text surrounding the scripture in question does not address the question of who is responsible for the actions of a stumbling brother, we must look at the scripture in context of the rest of the
Bible. According to the Bible, the stumbling brother is. If a recovering alcoholic finds himself in a position where there is a lot of beer in his immediate proximity and the urge is sneaking up on him, he alone is responsible for his decision to or not to give into that temptation. If a woman walks into your house, locks all the doors, takes off all of her clothes, climbs into your lap, and begs you to rock her world, and you agree to, who is responsible for your actions? According to the Bible (and, if I had to guess, your wife), you are. Check out 2 Corinthians 5:10. "For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one
may receive the things done in the body, according to what he has done,
whether good or bad." The scripture surrounding this verse speaks of how we are to live by faith and not by sight and how we should "make it [our] goal to please Him [God]". You will answer for the things you've done be it good or bad, not someone else. You must live by faith. No one can do that for you. You must make it your goal to please God. God isn't going to give you credit for something you didn't do, good or bad.
Obviously, the sex scenario I've described above involves sins committed by the one causing the other to stumble. The only person you should be doing that to is your spouse. That's spelled out quite clearly in scripture. That person is not, however, responsible for the actions of the other party involved. If someone asks you to kill someone for them, they'll be held accountable by God for making the request, but not for your decision to do it.
Unless what you're doing is a sin or you're doing it on their property, no one has the Biblical right to tell you that what you're doing is causing them to stumble and demand that you stop. If you're enjoying an alcoholic beverage and there's a recovering alcoholic around, it is the recovering alcoholic's responsibility to either leave the situation or stay in control of his actions. If someone who struggles with lust finds himself in the company of a person who is dressed in a way that makes him struggle with his thoughts or actions, the responsibility lies on him to stay in control of his thoughts or to remove himself from the situation. In certain situations, it might be okay for a struggling brother to ask the object of his struggle to not do whatever the thing is, or, as the case may be, dress more "modestly". But it being OK to do so does not mean anyone has the right to do so
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